The first rule of Fight Club is nobody reviews Fight Club. Who are the people watching it? Your co-workers, your friends, your neighbors… All looking for some kind of real experience in this otherwise plastic life.
The Fifth Element
Whatever you think about this movie, you’d have to agree (even if you’re a woman) that Mila whatsherface is a babe. The plot of this movie didn’t make a whole lot of sense, but it was fun to watch (and not just cause of Mila). The effects were cool and some of the characters were interesting enough to hold my interest. It was just a bit of eye candy. (PS: I just saw this again… I think I liked it more on a second viewing. There was one odd plot thing though, what are the odds that Mila would fall in BW’s cab, with all the crazy traffic zooming around – he just happens to be the same person the government later hires to help with the same problem? – way too coincidental)
Fierce Creatures
I saw this movie in Pattaya, Thailand in a crummy hotel room. I was totally sick and unable to go golfing with my friends. So, I stayed inside almost all day in a half-conscious daze. The TV didn’t really come in very well, there was an annoying flashing horizontal line across the middle of the tiny screen. The speakers buzzed loudly in unison with the flashing line. I could barely hear the movie, but I watched it anyway. It seemed to be OK… a lot like “a fish called wanda” (go figure), but not quite as good. I’m not entirely sure what the plot even was.
Field of Dreams
Kevin Costner does baseball… again. (or was this his first baseball thing?) Anyway, I never really understood the supposed “magical” quality of baseball. It’s just a game. It’s not even a good metaphor for anything. I think this movie was more about the power of mass hypnosis and mind control than anything. I wonder if people still visit the actual farm field that was used in the film…
F/X
This would have been a really good 2-part episode of some TV show, but I wasn’t too impressed with it as a movie. I never liked movies where the “hero” knows exactly what’s going to happen in the next scene. Let’s see, I’m going to be trapped in a hallway with a gun-wielding thug… I better bring my portable mirror with me…
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
About as much fun as you can have in Chicago on a sunny weekday afternoon.
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
A couple guys go to Las Vegas, do tons of drugs, trash hotel rooms, get in and out of trouble, and leave. If this sounds cool, then you’ll like this movie. I can’t imagine that a movie with this plot and script could have been done any better. It’s based on a book which I never read, so I can’t compare it to anything. it was a nice escape for a little while… now I feel like I don’t have to ‘do way too many drugs and go to Las Vegas’, I can just watch this movie instead.
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Damn good movie. Most of these movies really lose their appeal after you reach a certain age, this one is still very “watchable” for me. Sean Penn put in the best performance of his life in this movie (well, maybe that’s a bit extreme, but he was darn funny).
Fargo
If you’re from rural Minnesota, I have news from you – you DO talk like that. Everyone I meet from MN says this movie picks on them unfairly “we don’t talk like that”, they say. They oughta take a step back and listen sometime. As for the movie, I liked the way the hero was just a regular gal, and for that matter, everyone in the movie was just darn regular.
Far From Heaven
If somebody had made a movie about homosexuality & interracial romance in 1958, it would have looked a lot like this one (it probably wouldn’t have been as good though). Everything from the dialog to the music is straight from upper-class proto-suburban 1950-something. It’s the kind of movie that transports the viewer to another place, time & civic sense. That’s what movies are for, aren’t they?
Far and Away
I enjoyed it, especially the way it took many wrong turns for the “happy ending” to unfold. I wasn’t even bothered by Tom Cruise.
Farenelli: What happens to those vienna boys when they grow up without their hormones attached? This is a story of one of them. He’s loved for his voice, but has trouble being happy because… well… you know. What a bum deal. Anyway, the singing was done by two singers – a man and a woman who’s voices were “morphed” together. The result is rather bizarre, but I think it fits the character. Farenelli was bizarre. It doesn’t matter if the voice sounds fake, I think it fits even better because of it.
The Eyes of Tammy Faye
What a gem… This movie may actually make you feel sorry for Tammy Faye Bakker… or at least sympathize with her. After all, behind all that makeup is a real person. There is another side to every story, even if both sides are totally warped.
The Exorcist
This is one of the few movies that scared me when I was a kid. I was afraid that the devil would take over my soul or something. Of course I laugh about it now. I guess age destroys our childhood.
Existenz
I was expecting more. Everybody looks like they’re on Quaaludes.
Evolution
I saw this on a train ride from LA to Seattle… Well, I tried not to see it, but they played it like 5 times with the volume cranked up. Unless you’re in a similar situation, don’t bother with this. It’s not even worth fast-forwarding through.
Ever After
Drew Barrymore is Cinderella.. spoiler: they all live happily ever after! If I have to watch a love story on film, I guess this will do. One thing though… What does she see in him? He totally blows her off and she forgives him without even an apology? come on! I was expecting a little more Hollywood political correctness from this movie dammit! All in all, it was a good evening’s entertainment… although by some cruel twist of fate, I’ve now been forced to view this movie (or at least parts of it) about 6 times… enough already!!!!
Eyes Wide Shut
A fine although sad end to Stanley Kubrick’s career. I’m sorry that he didn’t make more movies, because all of them are really cool and uniquely stylish. I wish I had seen this on a big screen. I probably need to see it again in order to understand just what it was “really” about, but as far as I could tell it probed the fine line between thought and action – between fantasy and reality. Parts of this movie were almost a manifestation of those secret twisted thoughts that we all have. “she” had the thoughts & “he” acted on them. I could write more, but I’m afraid I’m out of my league. See this movie.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
I wish someone could wipe my memory clean, so I could experience this movie for the first time, over and over and over again. Even Jim Carrey couldn’t mess this up – it was that good.
Escape from the Planet of the Apes
Damn, which one was this? I know I saw them all…
Escape from Alcatraz
Interesting how low-budget this seems. There’s virtually no score and the lighting is really pretty bad. Yet, it does work. I couldn’t help thinking if this was made today, how much more they’d make our hearts leap – thinking they were going to get caught again and again and again in an emotional roller-coaster. From that aspect it was a little refreshing. That lack of constant tension made it a bit more real.
Erik The Viking
I can’t believe that my TV guide (which I’m using as a memory cue) gave this movie 1 star! what the hell? It was fun through and through, and totally original.
Enter The Dragon
Bruce Lee’s big Hollywood movie… and probably his worst. Who the hell was that stupid looking washed-up surfer turned “karate-man”? This could have been done so much better. Still, there are a few great moments of classic Bruce.
The English Patient
A seriously boring movie. Nothing frickin happens. Who cares?
Enemy Mine
A well done movie that is less about aliens, and more about human nature. Can’t we all just get along? This movie shows still more reasons why war is stupid. I liked the way the characters in the movie changed throughout the story. The transition is done well, and it all makes sense – they don’t just start liking eachother for no reason.
The Endurance
A bunch of hardy polar explorers get in a wee bit of a tough spot, but manage to work things out (after they eat their dogs and such). We’re such wimps now-a-days.